Best Friends?

Today is the day I realized that I don’t really have a “Best Friend.”

Please, don’t feel sorry for me. It’s quite the opposite actually. And that’s the reason I am writing, to explore the very definition, the very essence of a typical Best Friend.

Go ahead, describe to me your bestest ever friend. Go for it! Huh? What qualities does your BFF posses that qualify him or her to bear such a unique and proud title? Let me give it a shot. A Best Friend, in by all worldly definition, is someone who I can do anything with. Eventually, this person will be my future wife, but for now, anyone can qualify for that position. They are someone whom I enjoy spending all my time with, someone I can be totally transparent with, and someone in whom I trust all my vulnerabilities and who trusts me to hold theirs. They are someone I can adventure with. Someone I can stay home and read books with. Someone I can grow with in every way. By all secular terms, this is what my Best Friend should be.

Why do I say “by the world’s standards”? By all accounts, the World clings to the term “Best Friend” as if they were their saving grace. Ok I admit, we all need the emotional comfort that the name “Best Friend” brings with it. And on the receiving end, we all like to be the bearers of such a title! Is it true that some people we just get along with better than others? Absolutely. Is it true that we have a lot more in common, a lot more fun, and a lot more trust with one or a few people than others? Of course!

Here’s what I am saying. As Christians, how cool would it be to use the term Battle Buddy rather than Best Friend? Think about it. I could care less who’s Myers-Briggs Personality Profile best matches mine (ENTJ btw, in case you don’t have a best friend either). I could honestly though, care less.

What should I be focused on? Spiritual Growth. Iron sharpening Iron. The question we should ask ourselves is not, “Who do I have the most fun with?” “Who do I get along with the best?” The question instead should be, “Who challenges me the most in Christ?” “From whom have I grown the most spiritually over the last period of time?” “Who has helped draw me closer to the Lord the most?” THESE should be the underlying questions when it comes to that ultimate “Best Friend Showdown” search.

The World will have you place people in a priority listing. Facebook used to have it, Myspace had it. Top 5 Friends. And for those of us who just couldn’t decide between the last 2, they would allow us to increase it. Top 25 Friends. Wow how we would kill to be on those lists!

We were Created to have a relationship with our Father. We were Called to have a relationship with our fellow humans. It’s easy to say I love everyone. It’s easy to say I love you. You’re right though, we’re all sinful. And because of that sin, we will always naturally prioritize people in our lives. Starting with our families first, and so on.

I would submit today though, that each of you actually write out the names of your 3 “Best Friends”  (reminds me of a song…) and ask yourself this question: Why are they my friends? Evaluate whether they are simply a political move (networking, social life, etc.), maybe it is a mutual business relationship (give and get), or maybe you truly do simply enjoy being with these people. Now ask yourself the follow-up: How have these people helped me to grow spiritually in my walk, and closer to God?

Paul didn’t enjoy Timothy’s company for purely secular reasons (though I am sure they had their fair share of fun teasing Roman guards and sneaking around cities…) Jesus didn’t call John his Beloved and trust the care of his earthly mother to him for no reason. You and I are going to have Best Friends, or rather, Battle Buddy’s.

Who has poured the most into your Eternal Life?

The Latest and Greatest Part II

“And So It Is.”

End Line.

Maranatha.

The Latest and Greatest.

April 17, 2011
Treading Water, Sea of Japan

Good evening Family, Friends, Loved Ones!      

I am writing you all from my ship-board computer, onboard the USS George Washington where we are currently perfecting the art of the Figure Eight. This letter is coming on behalf of the both of us, that is, the beautiful woman I am now Courting, Miss Yukie Ida.

Yukie has 3 older sisters, and one younger brother. All 4 of them are married now, with one sister living with her family in Korea. Yukie’s Father passed away back in 2006, and her mother lives here in Japan. Yukie is currently north in Misawa, working at the Cadence Ministry House there at Misawa Air Force Base helping with the Tsunami victims. She speaks both Japanese and English fluently, and is such a help to the American Missionaries bridging the gap with the locals. Please keep her safety in prayer as she is closer to the radiation, and in a more disaster-prone area. She will be back in Yokosuka for a few months before returning to her mission in Misawa.
                                                  Yokohama Ice Skating Rink
Yukie and I met in May of 2010, when the Lord brought me here to Japan. Through my previous experiences with the Cadence Ministry and all they do, God worked it out that I was able to get plugged in right away with this “Home Away from Home.” At that time, Yukie was living in the adjacent apartment, helping out with the daily operations of this ministry known locally as “The Light House.” As of Fall 2010, she was accepted as a Cadence Ministry Intern, and through the financial support of many friends and family, she now devotes all her time to this wonderful place. Full dinner is prepared and served to groups of 50 or more on Wednesday and Friday nights, followed by a Men’s/Women’s Bible Study Wednesdays, and a group worship time Fridays. Saturdays we do any number of events as a group, and then Church on Sundays. Throughout the week, aside from her own devotions, Yukie leads a Japanese Woman’s Bible Study, and spends countless hours helping, encouraging and serving others with all her heart!

                                                                Disney Sea, Japan 
After I first met her, our ship left for deployment 2 weeks later and the rest of the year I did not keep in any contact with her. It wasn’t even love at first sight, as the movies might say it should be. When we pulled back in November for 3 weeks, Yukie and I got to know one another better. Even then, however, we parted (for cruise) simply as friends. December came and I left the day after we pulled in for my expedition to Peru, then home for Christmas with the awesome Fam. All this to say, Yukie and I didn’t really get to know one another until the end of January, early February 2011.

I have to give her credit, she was a lot better at getting to know me in group settings then I was. I praise God for her strength in character, for my desires to single her out right away surely would have ruined everything. The very first thought I had, when I began to think of her in a “more than friends” mind-set was; “Wow, how His Ministry would double if we were together!” This is the first time I had ever thought that before, and it was really cool! My Dad had always told us as boys, “Make sure you marry someone who will DOUBLE your Ministry, not cut it in half.” Was this her? Was this the one?

I doubted myself. I shrugged off my feelings, justifying them as “fleshly desires” and selfish thought. This really confused her, I am sorry to say, because my initial pursuit then died away, as my mind and heart began searching for a “sign” that she, for sure, was the One. But to her credit, she was Faithful and True. And this is the second thing.

My Dad also told us all as boys, “Never, EVER marry a Christian girl. ALWAYS hold out for a Godly Woman.” This was my sign. I have never met a girl more Faithful to the Lord than Yukie. My Mom has been my role model in this, all my life. My Mom gets up early every morning to wake my brothers up (and once upon a time, to drag my lazy bum out of bed too!) and then get us ready for school. She did all this, but even this was not the start to her day. My Mom would wake up even earlier than that to have her own devotions, her own time with her Father! Faithfully, day to day my Mom put up with 5 knuckle-head boys, a dirty house, chores and everything else that goes into being the world’s greatest Mom (like ironing! Yuuuuk!) But through all of this—my Mom was Faithful. Faithful to the Lord first and foremost, Faithful to my Dad second, Faithful to me and my brothers third, and Faithful then to the rest of her family and friends. What an admirable trait! And until I met Yukie, I had no idea how important something like this was (and should be!) in a marriage.

Yukie has only been a Christian since October 2006, but the explosive growth she has shown has amazed me, caused me to Praise God for such a blessing! She is always in the Word, (Japanese AND English!) and so full of that blessed Truth! She is Faithful in her belief, and yet even more Faithful to God, to meet with Him and talk with Him! Funny actually, (you know you have mastered a language when you start dreaming in that language, they say), but she has been witnessed on several occasions by her family and friends, talking in her sleep. In English. One night, she even woke herself up calling on the name of Jesus! Her family didn’t understand any of what she said, but they DID recognize that Name, and I know they are all “Christians-in-progress”.

All this to say, I was able to translate two letters, one to her Mom and one to her Brother, asking for her hand in Courtship. (Which was hard, because of the lack of mail going on or off the ship!!) But I have just received their permission, Praise God, and excited to let you all know!

So here are some things you can keep us in prayer for as we begin this journey together.
1. Please pray for our Wisdom as we grow closer to God, and closer to each other. Pray    that I will make smart choices, and trust fully in the Lord to guide and provide!
2. Pray for her family, that through our relationship we would be a living testimony to them, and that (though the language barrier will be tough) we will be able to lead them all to Christ, through our love and dedication.
3. Please keep her and her family’s relationship in your prayers.
4. Pray that our relationship would Honor God, and further His Kingdom, and that through our Courtship, our Brothers and Sisters here and back in the States would have a Godly Example of what a healthy, Christ-focused Courtship should look like. (Especially here, as this is a Christian concept, and definitely NOT a Japanese tradition!)

To my four younger (bigger) brothers; don’t worry, she will win your heart through your stomach. Mmm Mmm goooooood!

Yukie and I look forward to keeping you all updated and in the loop! Ha, pray for her as she has to translate all this into Japanese for her family and friends! (Time for Rosetta Stone!)

Happily and Wonderfully Blessed;

 Tim and Yukie. <><

I’llllll Fly Away Old Glory…!

Usually, the Flight Deck of an Aircraft Carrier is secured when winds reach 40 knots.

Today, was a special case.

It was XO’s Happy Hour, you know, the not-so-happy hour of cleaning the entire ship every morning at 0730. I was making my daily rounds of our Flight Deck fueling stations, when the ship (on it’s own?) decided to speed up. “Whew! It sure is a windy day! Guess I’ll just walk up to station 6 over here…”

Next thing I knew, I was on all fours desperately clawing my way to Port, in some feeble attempt to roll myself off the Flight Deck and into the slightly protected shelter of the catwalk.

Did nobody announce this? Did I miss this? Whatever the case, we were well over 40 knots and I was lucky to have been close enough to the side to make it before I was blown off the Carrier, 60 feet to the frigid Japanese water below. Thank you God.

I need to bulk up.

Heart day: Japanese Way.

First of all, HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

Secondly; AMERICA, we do it ALL wrong. Please, allow me to enlighten you.

Japan. A country filled with history, honor, imperialism and tradition. Here, as in most every other country of the world, married Men go to work to provide, and married Woman, if they choose to work, do so for fun. (Crafts, hobbies, photography, etc.) though most stay at home to provide for the children, tame the household and support her husband. As such, the married Man works a ridiculous work schedule (the Japanese contractor who works for me, Tomo-san, rides his bike in 12 miles one way every day, rain snow or sun, and works Monday through Saturday!) to provide a good life for his wife and children, and in return, she packs him a lunch, ensures the children are educated and keeps the house clean.

In America, Valentine’s Day is celebrated with the stores preparing early January and focused on the Men purchasing gifts for their wives or loved ones. “Will you be my Valentine” is a common phrase that every girl waits to be asked by her special someone. The guy usually purchases a box of chocolate, flowers, and maybe a stuffed animal. In some cases, more creative men will take their dates to a formal dinner, and even the more ‘guilt-laden’ ones will purchase a lovely piece of jewelry, ‘conviently’ marked down for that holiday. So what do we have? We have one holiday, dedicated to ‘love’ (or some materialistic form of it) upon which the Man, having provided for his wife 364 other days of the year, is now obligated to aquire some sort of “special trinket” to ensure his loved one is not the only one left out. What does he get? her satisfaction? Her love right back? If her love and satisfaction is dependent on that pendent–something is definitely wrong.

But of course, the Japanese already knew that. That’s why, on February 14th, it is the Women who purchase gifts for the Men. It is the wives who take the husbands out for a nice dinner. It is that special gal who has been treated right, provided for, taken on multiple dates and paid for on every other day of the year; it is her who shows her appreciation for him. And what a lovely occasion it must be! To know that out there, my wife, or lover, or even just a friend; she appreciates the hard work and provision and love I give 364 days a year, and on this day, she recognizes it above any other day.

Ahhhhh Schucks. ‘Course, I’m still sticking with my original title; “Happy Single-Awareness Day.”

LOVE YOU ALL!!!
<3

So you want Humor?

Some things that help me make new friends (and scare away the old?)

Learning the valuable Boyd-Tongue Language: Sluuuuurring my sthpeethch.

Thank you, Sid the Sloff, for bringing us all together.
“They left me! They DO THIS EVERY YEAR! why…!”
“Ohhhh SYDNEY!!! YOoOhHOOO!”
“*gasp!!* CYNTHIA!”
“Oh Sydney! You told me to meet you here by the petrified tree so we could migrate together,
and here you are!”

Heh heh. Shthanks to my Miiom, my Unle Bwrad, and Cousin Lauren for this.
(Follow my Fellowship blog for more regular updates!) <3

Unexpected Expectancies.

This past weekend, I had lunch with an old acquaintance, CDR Haley, Chaplain and relieving Command Chaplain of the USS George Washington. He took me out to Chili’s, and I gave him a brief tour of the base. I am actually meeting with him to give him a tour of my house later today. It was pleasant, refreshing, and just plain neat.

I love you all;